Note: The quotes in this article are fictional.
[media-credit name=”Ed Coombs” align=”alignright” width=”236″]
[/media-credit]1. Kyle Busch: Busch faded late at Bristol, hitting the wall with 87 laps to go, and finished 14th, behind his three closest challengers for the Sprint Cup points lead, Jimmie Johnson, Matt Kenseth, and Carl Edwards, who came home fourth, sixth, and ninth, respectively. Busch and Johnson are now tied for the points lead, 32 up on Kenseth.
“I take pride in leading the point standings,” Busch said, “especially when my fellow leader is Johnson. As of driver with no Cup championships aspiring to be compared to one with five, this may be my only chance to be ‘like’ Jimmie.
“But let’s be honest. Win or lose, people love to talk about me. I’m like the Danica Patrick of NASCAR, but with less balls.”
2. Jimmie Johnson: Johnson finished fourth at Bristol, earning his 10th top-5 result of the year, and moved into a tied in the point standings with Kyle Busch, who finished 14th.
“I feel like I’m flying under the radar,” Johnson said, “despite being the points leader and the five-time defending champion. It just goes to show that in NASCAR circles, memories are short and title reigns are long.
“Last week, you heard me question Kyle Busch’s ability to handle the pressure of being the so-called favorite. It took only a week for me to be proven right. After winning at Michigan, Busch went to Bristol as not only the Cup favorite, but the favorite to win at Bristol. It’s clear he can’t handle the pressure of the Chase if he can’t even handle the pressure of being chased.”
3. Brad Keselowski: Keselowski remained NASCAR’s hottest driver, taking the win at Bristol for his third win of the year and second in the last four races. He is now 11th in the point standings, and a spot in the Chase For The Cup is all but guaranteed.
“Don’t call this a ‘Cinderella’ story,” Keselowski said. “Dale Earnhardt, Jr. has dibs on that, because he’s the one with the evil stepmother.
“Am I the biggest threat to Jimmie Johnson’s reign? It was merely a week ago that everyone was heralding another driver as Johnson’s biggest threat, but it appears that now, Kyle Busch is an ‘as been. As a favor to me, please send your condolences to Kyle via his Twitter address ‘@ssKyleBusch.’”
4. Jeff Gordon: Gordon led a race-high 206 laps in the Irwin Tools Night Race, but took four tires during the race’s final caution, falling behind Brad Keselowski and Martin Truex, Jr., who both took two tires. Gordon finished third and remained sixth in the point standings, 48 out of first.
“I’m not happy with the way NASCAR times pit road speeds,” Gordon said. “Brad Keselowski and Matt Kenseth clearly got away with speeding. I feel that they’re monitored under a completely different set of rules. Of course, who am I to complain? I, of all people, should know that ‘two-timing’ is okay as long as you don’t get caught.”
5. Kevin Harvick: Harvick struggled after a strong start at Bristol, falling two laps down just after the half-way point, and finished 22nd, one lap down. He has only one top-10 result since a seventh at Daytona in July, and is down to fifth in the point standings, 48 out of first.
“Luckily, things aren’t all bad,” Harvick said. “I won the Camping World Trucks race on Wednesday, then I called Kyle Busch a ‘crybaby’ after he complained about his fate in the Truck race last Wednesday. In both cases, it’s ‘bitchin.’
“Like some others, I clinched at least a wildcard spot in the Chase by virtue of my three wins. That means I could do nothing from now until the Chase starts, and I’m still in. My lackluster results since my third win at Charlotte indicate that’s the philosophy I’ve been living by since late May.”
6. Matt Kenseth: Kenseth led 110 laps at Bristol, second only to Jeff Gordon’s 206, and finished sixth, as he and teammate Carl Edwards, who finished ninth, clinched berths in the Chase For The Cup. Kenseth improved three spots in the point standings to third, and trails Kyle Busch and Jimmie Johnson by 32.
“Carl and I are in,” Kenseth said. “I’m quite relieved, that the thing Carl threatened to ‘punch’ was a ticket to the Chase and not me.”
7. Carl Edwards: Edwards posted his first top-10 finish in three weeks, coming home ninth in the Irwin Tools Night Race. Edwards remained fourth in the point standings, and is 35 out of first.
“I certainly haven’t been performing up to my standards,” Edwards said. “My teammates have asked this question for awhile now, but now, everyone wants to know, ‘What’s wrong with Carl Edwards?’
“Many think I became complacent after signing my huge contract extension with Roush Fenway, and as a result, my performance has been lacking. Is that the case? I’m not at liberty to answer. I can say this: ‘Money talks, and it also speaks volumes.”
8. Ryan Newman: Newman posted his second consecutive top-10 finish and fifth in the last seven races with an eighth at Bristol, leading four laps on the night. While teammate Tony Stewart has struggled lately, Newman has solidified his place in the standings, and is seventh with two races until the Chase.
“I won the pole for Bristol,” Newman said, “while Stewart started 43rd. Personally, I haven’t felt that much distance between teammates since Rusty Wallace and I drove for Penske.
“Tony’s at a disadvantage to some other drivers hovering on the Chase bubble. While Denny Hamlin, Brad Keselowski, and Paul Menard have one or more victories, Tony has none. That’s okay. I’ve told Tony the wins will come. Right now, he just needs to concentrate on making the Chase. Therefore, his mantra for the next two races is ‘Just in, baby.’”
9. Kurt Busch: Busch, traditionally a force at Bristol, finished 17th in the Irwin Tools Night Race as Penske teammate Brad Keselowski took the victory. Busch remained eighth in the point standings, 81 out of the lead.
“Brad’s taking the No. 2 Miller Lite Dodge to heights I only dreamed about,” Busch said. “It appears he ‘has my number,’ and everyone else’s for that matter.
“Brad is on an incredible tear as of late. Can anyone stop him? The results of a recent survey suggest the answer is ‘no.’ Drivers were asked, ‘If Brad Keselowski were ‘on fire,’ would you put him out? Most replied ‘no,’ and it looks as though they weren’t lying.”
10. Denny Hamlin: Hamlin kept his Chase hopes alive with a hard-earned seventh at Bristol, overcoming damage suffered on lap 297 when he was collected in a David Stremme-David Reutimann wreck. Hamlin moved up one spot to 13th in the standings, and is currently in position to earn a wildcard spot.
“Many drivers on the Chase bubble struggled,” Hamlin said, “including Tony Stewart, Clint Bowyer, and Paul Menard. That’s good news for me. I normally don’t delight in the misery of others, but being a teammate of Kyle Busch’s has taught me that it’s okay.
“My Chase situation is good, yet precarious. I have to be at the top of my game, otherwise I could be out. If I ‘mail it in,’ I’ll be sure to ‘Fed Ex-it.’”
