Note: The quotes in this article are fictional.
1. Kyle Busch: Busch outdueled Kyle Larson for the win at Chicagoland, posting his fifth win this season and 48th of his career.
“That was a wild final lap,” Busch said. “And the fans had the audacity to boo me, so I ‘shhhh’ed’ them. ‘Boo’ plus ‘shhh’ equals ‘Busch’ basically.”
2. Martin Truex Jr.: Truex took fourth in the Overton’s 400 at Chicagoland, recording his 11th top-five of the season.
“Contrary to last week at Sonoma,” Truex said, “the race at Chicagoland is decided on the track, and not in the pits. Kyle Busch won by spinning Kyle Larson; I won at Sonoma by tricking Kevin Harvick. I think it’s clear that NASCAR fans prefer the ‘take out’ to the ‘fake out.'”
3. Kevin Harvick: Harvick led 39 laps and finished third at Chicagoland.
“I could have snuck in for the win if Kyle Busch and Kyle Larson had wrecked each other,” Harvick said. “Had they done so, I would have been there to pick up the pieces, and inevitably, NASCAR would have called a debris caution.”
4. Joey Logano: Logano finished eighth at Chicagoland for his 13th top-10 result of the season.
“Some people are calling Sunday’s race the best one of the year,” Logano said. “And some are calling the final lap the ‘Lap Of The Century.’ That means Kyle Busch was part of the ‘Lap Of The Century’ with Kyle Larson, and Kurt Busch was a part of the ‘Slap Of The Century’ with Jimmy Spencer.”
5. Clint Bowyer: Bowyer finished fifth at Chicagoland, scoring his sixth top-five finish of the year.
“We had some pit road penalties that really cost us,” Bowyer said. “I got caught speeding on pit road, then got caught speeding while serving the penalty, and next, I ran right through a stop-and-go penalty. And finally, I drove our chances of winning straight into the ground.”
6. Kyle Larson: Larson charged to the front late and battled Kyle Busch in a memorable last lap at Chicagoland. After much contact, Busch gave Larson a final bump, spinning Larson and propelling Busch to the win.
“The No. 18 car got the best of me today,” Larson said. “Busch put the nose of the Skittles car on my back bumper and said ‘Taste the rainbow.’ In the business, I think that’s called getting ‘candy-assed.'”
7. Brad Keselowski: Keselowski finished ninth in the Overton’s 400.
“That was a heck of a battle between Kyle Busch and Kyle Larson for the win,” Keselowski said. “First Larson put Busch into the wall, then Busch returned the favor. When one Kyle does that to another Kyle, it’s called an ‘I for an I.'”
8. Denny Hamlin: Hamlin finished seventh at Chicagoland and is now eighth in the Monster Energy Cup points standings.
“That was Kyle’s 48th career Cup win,” Hamlin said. “That puts him one behind Tony Stewart. Kyle really wants to get ahead of Tony. Mostly so he can say, ‘Look! Tony Stewart’s behind!'”
9. Ryan Blaney: Blaney came home 18th at Chicagoland and is now 10th in the points standings, 241 out of first.
“What a treat for fans of NASCAR,” Blaney said. “Dale Earnhardt Jr. in the booth, and a thrilling finish on the track. Now, the term ‘slide job’ is a new part of NASCAR vernacular. Note to the people of Junior Nation: ‘vernacular’ is not an STD, and for a ‘slide job’ to take place, no money needs to change hands.”
10. Kurt Busch: Busch finished 17th at Chicagoland as younger brother Kyle took the win in dramatic fashion.
“I expressed frustration with Kevin Harvick racing me so hard on the final lap of Stage 2,” Busch said. “When I confronted Harvick about it, he referenced my brother Kyle’s mocking of booing fans with a ‘crying’ gesture and replied, ‘What he said.’ So, in the end, I guess Harvick ‘had a point,’ for winning the stage.”
