Note: The quotes in this article are fictional.
1. Jeff Gordon: Gordon, an eight-time winner at Martinsville, finished second in the Goody’s Headache Relief Shot 500, the best finish among Chase-eligible drivers. He leads the points standings by three over Ryan Newman.
“I just couldn’t catch Dale Earnhardt, Jr.,” Gordon said. “Would I have moved him out of the way had I got close enough? You bet. I took no teammates to the Chase, and I take no prisoners in the Chase.”
2. Joey Logano: Logano finished fifth at Martinsville as Penske teammate Brad Keselowski struggled and finished 31st.
“How many times to I have to apologize to Danica Patrick for wrecking her at Charlotte?” Logano said. “My goodness, I can’t imagine what it’s like to be her boyfriend, although I can’t say I haven’t fantasized about it.”
3. Ryan Newman: Newman finished third at Martinsville, posting his fifth straight top-10 result.
“I may be the forgotten man in the final eight of the Chase,” Newman said. “But I could surprise some people. Brad Keselowski calls me the ‘Matt Kenseth Of The Chase,’ because I can sneak up on you.”
4. Matt Kenseth: Kenseth finished sixth at Martinsville but raised the ire of Kevin Harvick, who was spun by Kenseth just past the halfway point. Harvick all but promised retaliation.
“I guess the question isn’t ‘Oh no,’” Kenseth said. “It’s ‘Owe? Yes.’
5. Denny Hamlin: Hamlin posted a solid eighth in the Goody’s Headache Relief Shot 500 at Martinsville.
“Martinsville was a ‘Headache’ for Kevin Harvick,” Hamlin said. “Finishing eighth was a ‘Relief’ for me. And Brad Keselowski’s championship hopes are nearly ‘Shot.’ ‘Goody!’”
6. Carl Edwards: Edwards struggled at Martinsville, spending much of the race a lap down and finishing 20th.
“I may have just driven myself out of Cup contention,” Edwards said. “I sense a pattern developing here—me saying my goodbyes early.”
7. Brad Keselowski: After staying alive with a dramatic win at Talladega last week, Keselowski lost his transmission with 64 laps left. He finished 31st.
“Something just snapped,” Keselowski said. “This time, it wasn’t me.
“Once again, I’ve placed myself behind the eight ball. But digging myself a hole seems to be the ‘queue’ for me to pull off a big win.”
8. Kevin Harvick: Harvick qualified a disappointing 33rd and worked his way to the front before contact with Matt Kenseth damaged the No. 4 Outback Chevrolet. Harvick finished 33rd and will likely need a win at Texas or Phoenix to advance to the final round.
“Speaking of ‘Outback,’” Harvick said, “I’d like to take Kenseth ‘out back,’ to the woodshed.
9. Dale Earnhardt, Jr.: Earnhardt led 79 laps and held off teammate Jeff Gordon to win the Goody’s Headache Relief Shot 500 at Martinsville. It was Earnhardt’s fourth win of the season, and his first ever in a Sprint Cup race at Martinsville..
“Winning that Martinsville grandfather clock has always been on my bucket list,” Earnhardt said. “It must be a very small bucket, because a ‘Cup’ won’t even fit in it.”
10. Kyle Busch: Busch responded from his disastrous finish at Talladega with an 11th at Martinsville. Excluding his Talladega result, Busch has finished 11th or better in every Chase races.
“I’ve put Talladega behind me,” Busch said. “Now, it’s on to Texas. Unfortunately, I’m not in the hunt, but Ill be interested to see how things play out. The line between fourth place and fifth place in the points standings will be hotly contested. And Texas is just the place for such a ‘border’ war.”
